you had an sti though, what did you expect? It's a street legal rally car. I have a bugeye wrx and love the car. It's quick, but i get almost 30 mpg. its comfy to me (5'11 185lbs) and the ride isn't harsh. I have suspension work done, but its still a nice ride, IMO, but I like a firmer, sporty feel. It's protuned and makes more power than a stock sti too. Sti's are firm, but they're not bad. anyone that drives a lifted jeep with factory control arms would appreciate the nice ride a wrx or an sti has. I've owned my wrx for almost 3 years now and have really enjoyed it. my only complaints are the cargo capacity(i'm a musician and carry a lot of equipment around) and the ride height, but then again the car is lowered, so i did it to myself. in deeper snow i tend to high center easily.
a car only goes as fast as you drive it. if you arent responsible enough to drive the car like an adult, then maybe its not the car for you, but just because it's quick doesnt mean you have to drive it that way. ultimately, you're the driver, not the car. wrx's and sti's both have small, quick spooling turbos, so they're good daily drivers and make good torque down low. it's very easy to drive one and stay out of boost and get good gas mileage.
but here's another subaru vote. If its for a woman that just wants a nice car, Id def go for a legacy if she wanted a sedan, and a forester our legacy outback wagon if she likes the suv kinda thing. they're awesome cars. read consumer reports. I would steer away from any of the turbocharged models if its strictly a commuter, though. gas will be cheaper as well as insurance.
Also, subaru's symmetrical all-wheel drive is the absolute best awd system on the market. they're fully symmetrical, so the power split left to right is the same. for traction, it can't be beat.
And btw, subaru turbo's dont need to sit and cool off after running. they're both water and oil cooled, so they dont have the problem with gumming up like a strictly oil cooled turbocharger does. There was a problem with the turbochargers in the forester xt's in the mid 2000's. something about oil starvation, so i'd avoid one of those if I could, or at least check to see if it had been taken back to the dealer and fixed under warranty. If i do drive my wrx hard, I always do let it idle for 20-30 seconds before i turn it off though, just for peace of mind. I've got 100k miles on my stock turbo and it still makes 21lbs every day