Dumb ways to almosy die

UncleWillie

UncleWillie

Rarely serious.
Joined
Dec 29, 2010
Location
Vale
Night before last I got a box of corn dogs out of the freezer. After removing the ones I was going to eat, I walked back to the freezer while reading the heating instructions.

Steph had used the vacuum. And had not put the cord away. I stepped on the cord with my right foot, I did a very violent split (pulling a groin muscle), slammed my elbow into the freezer handle(that still hurts all the way to my fingertips), and slung the frozen corn dogs all over the laundry room(which is just a waste). I wrenched my back really good in the fall.

Don't get old it sucks.
 
Here's one we all relate to... not near death, but .......
Got in the wifes car and after sitting down I had the problem all old guys have.
After raising up and pulling and re-locating things so I could get comfy I notice the wife watching me like a was mentally challenged.
What are you doing ...."sitting on my balls".
 
Ok, here's my contribution..

Last week, I took my motorcycle out for a nice spring ride to work. The clutch had been a little finicky going into neutral. So, I'm at a left turn stoplight. The light turns green and I'm making the left. I go to shift to second gear and I just feel everything go limp. Bike is in neutral with traffic behind me... I glance down and my foot platform and clutch lever are just dangling 🫪

It turns out the bolt holding the entire assembly in place is the clutch center pin and it had wallowed out! Luckily, there was a heating and AC place that had just opened up that I was able to coast into.

The good part of the story is that the owner saw me and came on out. Helped me trouble shoot the problem. When he didn't have a longer bolt (the first few threads on the female side were borked as well), he offered to drive me to Lowe's to get a new bolt. I didn't want to take that much time out of his day. So, he drove me back to my house and stored my bike in his shop for two days until I had a chance to swap a new bolt in. Needless to say Scott's Heating and AC are my new chosen maintainers for all my HVAC support. He came out this week and checked my whole system and did my annual cleaning.
 
We took our stand on electric scooters to the park last summer. As soon as we get there my wife goes to the bathroom. While waiting on her, I'm in the parking lot cutting figure 8's and trying to ride wheelies. I piled it up and was bleeding from my chin, shoulder, hands, elbow, and knee. I also took the handlebar to the groin right where the left leg meets the trunk of the body. I popped right up and tried to act like nothing had happened, but the blood and scrapes were a giveaway. I insisted that we still go for the scooter ride. Once back home, it hurt like hell to move at all. I barely moved and walked for the rest of the day due to that groin injury. I ended up with a large black and blue bruise there.
 
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