Anyone currently on anti anxiety meds? Need some advice

I appreciate all of the responses. I've known for a long time that I wasn't right. but I think with the pandemic, being a dad, trying to raise a family, and work, and not really taking time for myself to get out and do things for my own well being have just caught up with me and made things to me more noticeable. Saturday was a rough day for me. Met my parents for breakfast and we went shopping for my daughter for the upcoming soccer season (Something else that I think will be good for me) sounds nice right? Nope. I was on edge the entire time. My parents tend to drive me crazy and it just puts me in the mood that is hard for me to get out of. Yesterday, however, I had a great day being at home...normally I hate being stuck in the house and feel like I need to get out and do something. I tend to sleep pretty well. When I wake up, I feel rested and ready to go. My gut however, could use some attention. With my wife having UC, I have learned a lot about how your gut reacts to things and how your gut health is linked to a lot of different things in your body. I read an article not too long ago that suggests your gut is the most important part of your health and how your gut is your "new brain". My wife has completely cut dairy out of her diet and is focusing on foods that promote gut health and its amazing the difference it has made with her and I have adopted a good mount of her changes and I can tell a difference with me as well.
I have also tried to take time out of my day when the sun is out, to just be outside for 15 min and do nothing but soak in the rays and that tends to change my mood quite a bit. I have also learned that being the person that does everything for everyone else is a good thing, but not all the time. I have found that I have to take time just for me and realize that I am not being selfish in doing so. I am not tooting my own horn, but as a dad and a husband, I feel like it is my responsibility to make sure everything is taken care of and in doin that for so long, I forgot about me.
I had a crazy week last week, so I wasn't able to do any research for a doc/therapist to line up an appointment with, but is on my todo list for this week/next week.
 
Sorry to hear about your troubles. Prayers for you and yours.
A family member was depressed last year. Now they are fine. Stress from COVID and other things along with lack of gut health and vitamin D & B were the main cause. Turns out there are many people with vitamin deficiencies. In this case the Dr prescribed Zoloft before he even saw the blood work. Blood work showed a level of vitamin D that was quite a few points below an accepted low level.
The family member doesn't watch the news much anymore. They nearly quit caffeine, sugar and artificial colors and flavoring. Watch out for artificial sugars also which contain phenylalanine....
Hang in there
 
hunterdan said:
The family member doesn't watch the news much anymore. They nearly quit caffeine, sugar and artificial colors and flavoring.
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If the government actually cared about the health of the populace, they would do more to address these topics. And robocalls!
 
hunterdan said:
Sorry to hear about your troubles. Prayers for you and yours.
A family member was depressed last year. Now they are fine. Stress from COVID and other things along with lack of gut health and vitamin D & B were the main cause. Turns out there are many people with vitamin deficiencies. In this case the Dr prescribed Zoloft before he even saw the blood work. Blood work showed a level of vitamin D that was quite a few points below an accepted low level.
The family member doesn't watch the news much anymore. They nearly quit caffeine, sugar and artificial colors and flavoring. Watch out for artificial sugars also which contain phenylalanine....
Hang in there
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You know, you mentioning the news sparked something with me. I have always been a conservative and always followed politics and the news until about a year or so ago. recently, I was talking to my brother in law who is in the know about everything related to what's going on in the world and with politics and is very much outspoken about his conservative views, which is fine, but him and I were talking about he asked me about this and asked me about that and I had to flat out tell him that I stopped watching the news. I figured out that on days I didn't watch the news, I was happier. Not that I really worried about anything that I saw, but I noticed that it just raised my anxiety level and just felt like I was getting unwanted information forced into my ear hole that I couldn't do anything about and one of the things that I was told to do is not to worry about the things you can't control. Now, every time I talk to my BIL or FIL, our conversations are only about politics and it just gets to be a bit much for me. I don't mind having a healthy convo about whatever, but I also need some positivity being thrown into the mix.
I have also never been much of a "Quote" guy, but I recently read a quote that is now written on our chalk board in the kitchen and I look at it everyday and has really seemed to help me. "Focus on an ocean of positives, not a puddle of negatives"
I also pray every morning and realize that I am very blessed and I cannot and will not have my joy taken away. It's been difficult admitting not that I have an issue with anxiety or possibly OCD, but that possibly I will need to be put on medication for it, but I have accepted that if I do need to be put on something, it will hopefully be to make me a better person.
 
Cherokeekid88 said:
You know, you mentioning the news sparked something with me. I have always been a conservative and always followed politics and the news until about a year or so ago. recently, I was talking to my brother in law who is in the know about everything related to what's going on in the world and with politics and is very much outspoken about his conservative views, which is fine, but him and I were talking about he asked me about this and asked me about that and I had to flat out tell him that I stopped watching the news. I figured out that on days I didn't watch the news, I was happier. Not that I really worried about anything that I saw, but I noticed that it just raised my anxiety level and just felt like I was getting unwanted information forced into my ear hole that I couldn't do anything about and one of the things that I was told to do is not to worry about the things you can't control. Now, every time I talk to my BIL or FIL, our conversations are only about politics and it just gets to be a bit much for me. I don't mind having a healthy convo about whatever, but I also need some positivity being thrown into the mix.
I have also never been much of a "Quote" guy, but I recently read a quote that is now written on our chalk board in the kitchen and I look at it everyday and has really seemed to help me. "Focus on an ocean of positives, not a puddle of negatives"
I also pray every morning and realize that I am very blessed and I cannot and will not have my joy taken away. It's been difficult admitting not that I have an issue with anxiety or possibly OCD, but that possibly I will need to be put on medication for it, but I have accepted that if I do need to be put on something, it will hopefully be to make me a better person.
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When was the last time you shot a gun or blew something up or ran a chainsaw or set something on fire? (I am not a mental health professional, but I know what helps my mental state remain professional)
 
jeepinmatt said:
When was the last time you shot a gun or blew something up or ran a chainsaw or set something on fire? (I am not a mental health professional, but I know what helps my mental state remain professional)
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In all honesty... it's been a while. in early 2021, I finished up my Glock 19 build and I have yet to shoot it. I know, I know, but this was also part of my problem... I felt like I was taking time for myself when I should be with my family, I've realized that its ok to get away and do something for yourself, so as the weather gets warmer, I will be getting back out to the range.
 
I didn't read everything, too busy. But I will say your diet, sleep and exercise are really linked to mental health. Along with not watching current events. We've talked about this before, but you seem to really struggle to take some time for yourself. That may have been addressed above, didn't read. You NEED time for YOU. But I won't waste time talking about that again.

I will say, that after all of the above there was improvement in my wife's anxiety, however it was still crippling her. After all that we decided to try Lexapro. It took about 6 weeks to see a difference but man what a game changer. We had been on a wheeling trip last year and she was pretty nutty. A close friend that was on that trip decided it was time to talk about it and he let me know that he used to be just like her and he could see that she was a prisoner to herself and her worry, about literally everything. It put a damper on the trip, to the point that we will no longer travel with friends like that.
I shared with my wife what he said and we decided it was time to try it. I have been against it for years due what I have seen prescription pills do to people I loved, but I learned a lot about it and have no regrets for my wife getting on anxiety meds.
 
Making time for yourself is paramount.
Earlier I mentioned being a people pleaser, codepenency, etc for me. Part of my journey was making time for me w/o feeling guilt. I had to learn to make myself a priority regardless of other's expectations.
I was taught to not do anything out of F.O.G. Fear, Obligation or Guilt.
My way to do this was getting really into mountain biking. I made a schedule and stuck to it. One day a weekend was "I'm riding _______ trail Sunday at 1. Be home by 5 or so." I didn't ask, it was known that was what I was doing. Obviously, I made sure my other commitments (work, family, home) were met. I unapologetically made my mental health a priority. Doing so made me such a better friend, husband and human in general.
That's my journey. Yours will be different.
Recognizing your need for help is a big deal. I'm proud of you man. Really.
 
Jody Treadway said:
Making time for yourself is paramount.
Earlier I mentioned being a people pleaser, codepenency, etc for me. Part of my journey was making time for me w/o feeling guilt. I had to learn to make myself a priority regardless of other's expectations.
I was taught to not do anything out of F.O.G. Fear, Obligation or Guilt.
My way to do this was getting really into mountain biking. I made a schedule and stuck to it. One day a weekend was "I'm riding _______ trail Sunday at 1. Be home by 5 or so." I didn't ask, it was known that was what I was doing. Obviously, I made sure my other commitments (work, family, home) were met. I unapologetically made my mental health a priority. Doing so made me such a better friend, husband and human in general.
That's my journey. Yours will be different.
Recognizing your need for help is a big deal. I'm proud of you man. Really.
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I appreciate that man, I really do.
I think for a long time, I've just ignored or just deflected any feelings I had towards anything as I just need to man up and just do it, but then I started feeling like I was holding a lot of weight on my shoulders and I just kept piling it on without trying to unload any of it and it just sent me into this sort of woe is me mentality and it made me realize that I have been giving and giving without receiving anything, but it wasn't that I wasn't being offered help, I just never accepted it.
 
If you like owning things that go bang I suggest you refrain from talking about this online and delete this thread.
Even more so if you carry.
 
I have suffered with both depression and with anxiety. I'd say most of both has been attributed to my health, in some way, fashion or form. I used to get a lot of anxiety after my heart attack and the five by-passes. So much so, I went to the doc and told him something was wrong with my heart. It would be trying to jump out of my chest and would skip beats(so I thought) He did every test he could on me, then sent me to a cardiologist. He did more test and even had me wearing a heart monitor. Bottom line, nothing wrong with my heart, it was just that after all I had went through, I dwelt on thinking something was wrong and I might die. Once they convinced me my heart was ok, the anxiety went away. As for the skipping a beat, yes and no, what was happening was a valve was staying open longer, filling that part of my heart with more blood, si it didn't skip, it was taking longer to get more blood in.
2020 really sucked for me. five surgeries and a life ending issue, that was corrected. I don't have the means (monetary) I once had, so, to conserve I stay home most of the time. Living alone, sucks in this case. Plenty to do, but health keeps me from a lot of it. Used to be, I had phone calls daily, from multiple people. That don't happen much any more. I have a couple of friends who call me several times a week. I used to get invites to wheeling trips nearly weekly, I don't get that any more.
I am running out of things to sell, to make ends meet, until and if I get my disability. So yeah, I worry a lot about just paying bills. I used to be one who was always helping others, and now I am in a position where it's difficult to help myself. I have been helped by several folks. From someone coming here to make me something to eat or even get me something to drink, because I can't walk from my bed to the kitchen without falling. Or it could be something in my shop that I can get loose due to my f'ed up hands and grip, or my lack of strength to pick something up. Those things cause both anxiety and depression. But Damn, I don't want another freaking pill to take!
I get asked often "how are you doing?" I usually answer same ol same ol. I don't think may wanna actually hear how things really are!

I wish you the best, Jody has given you a lot of good advice. One more thing I will note. I watch several YouTube channels. One of them being "lumna Acres" That guy used to severely suffer from both anxiety and depression. He made a lot of life changes, Job, Diet, and life style. He now has it under control and has his shit together.
 
So I am reviving this thread because shortly after this thread and told myself I wanted to take charge. I didn't get in touch with anyone ( more on that later) and i started trying to trick my brain by having my lunch outside, going on walks, just being out in nature and really thinking about my reactions to things and taking a step back and really looking at my next move. I started researching for more natural ways to try and deal with this head on, so I started taking Magnesium and Ashwagandha, which I think has actually helped me a bit, but it doesn't help me not to bottle things up and then have a way of dealing with them. Last night, I had a full on panic attack. Couldn't sit still, paced the house for a good 30 minutes just to try and tire myself out so that I could sleep, felt like it was hard to breathe even though I could breathe just fine. I think dealing with everything that's going on with my wife's family, I've tried to be the rock and let my wife have someone to come to and just be strong for her, but I think in the process has worn me down mentally on top of everything else that is just life. I think its time to at least speak to someone like a therapist who can help me navigate my thoughts and feelings and possible be put on something. I have realized that I have become my Dad, which he is great guy but he has no emotions and is always on the verge of being irritated.
 
Cherokeekid88 said:
I think dealing with everything that's going on with my wife's family, I've tried to be the rock and let my wife have someone to come to and just be strong for her, but I think in the process has worn me down mentally on top of everything else that is just life. I think its time to at least speak to someone like a therapist who can help me navigate my thoughts and feelings and possible be put on something. I have realized that I have become my Dad, which he is great guy but he has no emotions and is always on the verge of being irritated.
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100% time to see a therapist my man.
Physiological aides, whether prescription or not, will only get you so far. The behavioral change - like slowly working up to speaking your mind, letting teh emotions out, not being the bottle that WILL become the powder keg - no amount of external physio is going to fix.

...and this is coming from a physiologist.
 
RatLabGuy said:
100% time to see a therapist my man.
Physiological aides, whether prescription or not, will only get you so far. The behavioral change - like slowly working up to speaking your mind, letting teh emotions out, not being the bottle that WILL become the powder keg - no amount of external physio is going to fix.

...and this is coming from a physiologist.
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My work has a program that I can go through that I am going to try that hooks me up with a therapists and is covered as well. So I will try to see what is available to me and see where it takes me!
 
I know it feels like a HUGE step, but just do it. You’ll wonder why you waited so long. Therapy (let’s call it COACHING since that term is less stigmatized) also made me realize that there are lots of people who specialize in things that can make me better at whatever it is I need to be better at. I now view it as a shortcut to success (vs trying to figure it all out by myself). It’s nice to have someone in your corner who can push you out of your comfort (or uncomfort?) zone.
 
I feel you. Ill do something here i dont normally do. Im quite private, borderline im perpetually on Castaway island in my head on the day to day. Im diagnosed with cptsd and constantly struggles not joining the 22 Club. Ive tried all the asheville hippy shit. Ive tried the weeds, the microdosing. You name it. Ive tried the SSRI (they made me dead inside). When a anxiety attack hits, its random and consuming. Ive since started a journal on my phone, and when an attack happens i record the highlight events of the past 48 hours. So i can begin to discover my triggers, and from there begin to work on how i receive and process those triggers. There is a pill that they give SF, called Propranolol before going into known shitshows. Its the only thing that works for me. Its a suitcase pill, term for works immediatley only one dose needed. So no need to constantly take something and mess with side effects and long term unknowns, and its not a addictive one either like zanax etc. When I feel something coming on or when its in full onset, i can pop one and everything slows down, but my brain stays clear.

I have worked on gut microbiome, healthy foods, vitamin and mineral balances. All important stuff. For many people, the combination of Vitamin D3 + K2, Saffron, Omega 3, B1, and L-Theanine combo is a powerful punch to knock out depression, anxiety, adhd, etc. These have worked in other areas for me, but my anxiety from cptsd has not improved from any of it.

My short bio. Hope it helps.
 
ckruzer said:
I feel you. Ill do something here i dont normally do. Im quite private, borderline im perpetually on Castaway island in my head on the day to day. Im diagnosed with cptsd and constantly struggles not joining the 22 Club. Ive tried all the asheville hippy shit. Ive tried the weeds, the microdosing. You name it. Ive tried the SSRI (they made me dead inside). When a anxiety attack hits, its random and consuming. Ive since started a journal on my phone, and when an attack happens i record the highlight events of the past 48 hours. So i can begin to discover my triggers, and from there begin to work on how i receive and process those triggers. There is a pill that they give SF, called Propranolol before going into known shitshows. Its the only thing that works for me. Its a suitcase pill, term for works immediatley only one dose needed. So no need to constantly take something and mess with side effects and long term unknowns, and its not a addictive one either like zanax etc. When I feel something coming on or when its in full onset, i can pop one and everything slows down, but my brain stays clear.

I have worked on gut microbiome, healthy foods, vitamin and mineral balances. All important stuff. For many people, the combination of Vitamin D3 + K2, Saffron, Omega 3, B1, and L-Theanine combo is a powerful punch to knock out depression, anxiety, adhd, etc. These have worked in other areas for me, but my anxiety from cptsd has not improved from any of it.

My short bio. Hope it helps.
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Man, wow.

I drank for a long time and I think that's why I went for so long and it didn't bother me on the surface, but deep down, its always been there brewing... I would just shove it back down with alcohol and everything was fine... temporarily. Then I stopped drinking and had nothing to grab onto to help with it and I think thats when It sort of hit me full swing and I deal with it 24/7. I know that if it starts getting loud, I will go outside and go for a walk, do some busy work, or just try and focus on something like a show or movie or whatever. I think since I have been taking Magnesium/Ashwagandha/Vitamin D, I can tell a difference, it doesn't seem as severe to me, but its still present and its like my body needs to rest and be in a very tranquil place, but my mind definitely doesn't want that. So its a constant battle of staying busy and out of my head, but also trying to rest becasue I know my body needs it. I honestly, just want something that makes me care less but still able to keep my personality and doesn't affect the way I think.
 
Andy J. said:
I know it feels like a HUGE step, but just do it. You’ll wonder why you waited so long. Therapy (let’s call it COACHING since that term is less stigmatized) also made me realize that there are lots of people who specialize in things that can make me better at whatever it is I need to be better at. I now view it as a shortcut to success (vs trying to figure it all out by myself). It’s nice to have someone in your corner who can push you out of your comfort (or uncomfort?) zone.
Click to expand...
The hardest part right now is finding the right person because I can't just open up to anyone, I need to feel some sort of a connection or safety and thats what I struggle with when trying to find someone that I can talk to and trust.
 
Cherokeekid88 said:
The hardest part right now is finding the right person because I can't just open up to anyone, I need to feel some sort of a connection or safety and thats what I struggle with when trying to find someone that I can talk to and trust.
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I feel this the most. Never found one that I really liked. The last one I saw I told about suicidal and homicidal thoughts. He goes, “yeah, a lot of folks feel those things. It’s pretty normal.” Needless to say, never went back to them.

And those feelings are gone and have never come back.
 
Jody Treadway said:
I'm super busy at work. But mental health is a huge deal for me and you deserve some help. :)
I used to have anxiety, bad. Like see my heart beating through my shirt bad. Couldn't sleep, mind racing, the usual.
In short, lay off the meds until you get an accurate evaluation and diagnosis from a mental health professional. You need to get to the core of your anxiety, not mask the symptoms.
It took me a few visits to determine I can be codependent, a people pleaser and need to learn to detatch. Read some books, was diligent with appointments with my therapist and most importantly, i applied what I was being taught when the situation presented itself.
It worked.
I react completely differently to situations than I once did. I do it an dsleep like a baby. It can work for you.
Start here and be brave enough to be vulnerable: Psychology Today: Health, Help, Happiness + Find a Therapist
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Still recommend clicking the link above.
 
Cherokeekid88 said:
The hardest part right now is finding the right person because I can't just open up to anyone, I need to feel some sort of a connection or safety and thats what I struggle with when trying to find someone that I can talk to and trust.
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I hear ya, but it’s a chicken-or-the-egg kinda problem. You can’t open up if you don’t have the connection and you can’t get the connection without opening up.

Their job is to help you in the best way they know how. The faster you open up, the faster you can determine whether or not they will actually be able to help you. Certainly it takes a meeting or two to get to know each other better before you can dive into the heavy stuff, but any therapist worth his salt knows what questions to ask so he can access what the most pressing issues are that need to be explored first.

If it doesn’t workout the first time, you hopefully learned something and will have better luck next round. Keep an open mind and don’t get attached to the outcome. I trust you’ll find the help you need. We’re pulling for you.
 
Cherokeekid88 said:
The hardest part right now is finding the right person because I can't just open up to anyone, I need to feel some sort of a connection or safety and thats what I struggle with when trying to find someone that I can talk to and trust.
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Jody Treadway said:
be brave enough to be vulnerable:
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The quoted part of Jody's message is so key here.
Disclosure - I havent seen a therapist/coach/whatever since court appointed session stopped at like 12 years old. But...
I'm a nerd and I read and study on a lot and try to constantly self assess and improve. Jody's last line is an encyclopedia worth of advise in 6 words and it takes a lifetime to appreciate.

I cant remember if it was Budhha, Ghandi, or Socrates but the line that sticks with me is 'Willful vulnerability is the ultimate strength.'

You have to CHOOSE to be brave enough to be vulnerable...once you do...no one can hurt you.
 
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Cherokeekid88 said:
Man, wow.

I drank for a long time and I think that's why I went for so long and it didn't bother me on the surface, but deep down, its always been there brewing... I would just shove it back down with alcohol and everything was fine... temporarily. Then I stopped drinking and had nothing to grab onto to help with it and I think thats when It sort of hit me full swing and I deal with it 24/7. I know that if it starts getting loud, I will go outside and go for a walk, do some busy work, or just try and focus on something like a show or movie or whatever. I think since I have been taking Magnesium/Ashwagandha/Vitamin D, I can tell a difference, it doesn't seem as severe to me, but its still present and its like my body needs to rest and be in a very tranquil place, but my mind definitely doesn't want that. So its a constant battle of staying busy and out of my head, but also trying to rest becasue I know my body needs it. I honestly, just want something that makes me care less but still able to keep my personality and doesn't affect the way I think.
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tobacco products is the blindfold that ive defaulted to over the years. thats exactly what it is like for me. I cant handle any noise or lights when it happens. and at the same time i dont want to sit still. The pill I mentioned has worked excellent for me and doesnt have all the crazy shit attached to it like prozac (there is a high suicide rate if you come off prozac)
 
Cherokeekid88 said:
The hardest part right now is finding the right person because I can't just open up to anyone, I need to feel some sort of a connection or safety and thats what I struggle with when trying to find someone that I can talk to and trust.
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That was my problem but I stuck with it and kept trying different ones. from each one I got a nugget here or there and I would put them together myself and make a plan of action.
 
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