oh man....

[marty79]

so this afternoon we got called to our church in emergency...oh boy...a good friend of my daughter and many other kids took his life early 1am last night ...oh my lord, wth. According to pastor and other kids, he didn't really show any signs. Oh man did this not only hit my daughter hard of course but hit pretty deep with me since I have been there myself and barely escaped from it long time ago.
Gosh to think he felt he had no choice at all but to do that....dam I feel for him so badly, wish I could do something but nothing to do....so young, so lost, so unaccomplished, so sad and depressed, so miserable this kid felt that he gave his life to the enemy
it has helped my daughter see a new perspective on some things now. She understands why I have chats often about kids, drugs, sex, violence, bullies, feelings etc and how she needs to learn about them and cope with life's hardest times without resulting to those negative crutches but coming to us for advice and direction and when she gets annoyed about our conversations...now she sees why?!! She now knows and sees it's better to have us involved constantly in her life, all aspects of it, rather than hiding anything and keeping secrets.
well just say a few prayers for the family and friends that are dealing with this tragedy

 

[CasterTroy]

Unfortunately nothing can be said that will "help". There are really no words of "comfort" in a situation like this. It just sucks.

More suffer than most ever realize. So many wear masks for just so long until they just can't any longer. And for many, they are looking for any reason to stay. Just one person to show they care. Just one person to give them the sign they need to not "pull that trigger"
You never know what someone is suffering from. You never know the walk they have to make every single day. Sometimes it only takes a single txt or call, or visit to change the direction of a persons life. But..in the same way, you can't carry the guilt of "what if I had just...."

Personally I do my very best to be the friend I would want to have. To be the person that reaches out to folks that struggle. I do this because its the right thing to do, but also so that I can live without the guilt of wondering if I could have done more.

If any of you know someone that can't seem to get over it like you think they should....please show compassion instead of disdain. Try a little encouragement. And in the best way possible.....remind them there IS help: 800-273-8255

 

[Cherokeekid88]

Man, this story hits home for me. My best friend growing up took his life when he was 18. We grew up together and got separated by school zones when he moved and had to go to a different elementary school, we just sort of lost touch. Then he started going to my middle school when I was in 6th grade and it was like we never missed a beat. When high school started, he got involved in drugs... Pills, weed, who knows what else and I could see him changing and I tried to talk to him about it but he assured me that he was fine and he didn't have a problem. Slowly, I started seeing less of him. He dropped out of school and I would only see him occasionally when the bus I rode home would drive by his apartment complex he and his mom lived in. A couple of years went by and I was working at Harris Teeter at the time and I guess he found out that I worked there and he came to visit me. He had been in rebab for 6 months and was actually clean and sober for 9 months. I could tell by our conversation that he was not ok. I tried to talk to him as best I could and I told him that I wanted us to hang out because I felt like what he needed at the time was a friend. I called him a couple of times over the next week and could never iron out a time for us to hang and around 2 weeks after I had seen him, I found out that he had hung himself. Even typing this 14 years later, it brings back all the feelings I had right after it happened and how I still today feel like I could have done more...

He left a note that basically said that without drugs, he felt like his life didn't have a purpose. He had lost everything he had before and didn't think he could get it back.

Fast forward to a couple of years ago, had a friend call me in the middle of the night who was about a 5th of jack in and I could tell something wasn't right, but he was going on and on about how he didn't have anyone, how he had moved to Virginia to work and make money and thought that would make him happy and how unhappy he actually was.... I thought back to Mason and decided to stay on the phone with him for a couple of hours and we made plans that night for my wife and I to drive up and stay with him for the weekend. I don't know if anything would have happened that night or not, but by the sound in his voice, I couldn't take that chance.

but like @CasterTroy said, you just don't know what people deal with on a day to day basis and the mind is a very powerful and potentially dangerous place to stay in. Suicide unfortunately is on the rise with the pandemic and its really one of the saddest things to hear about.

 

[marty79]

Man, this story hits home for me. My best friend growing up took his life when he was 18. We grew up together and got separated by school zones when he moved and had to go to a different elementary school, we just sort of lost touch. Then he started going to my middle school when I was in 6th grade and it was like we never missed a beat. When high school started, he got involved in drugs... Pills, weed, who knows what else and I could see him changing and I tried to talk to him about it but he assured me that he was fine and he didn't have a problem. Slowly, I started seeing less of him. He dropped out of school and I would only see him occasionally when the bus I rode home would drive by his apartment complex he and his mom lived in. A couple of years went by and I was working at Harris Teeter at the time and I guess he found out that I worked there and he came to visit me. He had been in rebab for 6 months and was actually clean and sober for 9 months. I could tell by our conversation that he was not ok. I tried to talk to him as best I could and I told him that I wanted us to hang out because I felt like what he needed at the time was a friend. I called him a couple of times over the next week and could never iron out a time for us to hang and around 2 weeks after I had seen him, I found out that he had hung himself. Even typing this 14 years later, it brings back all the feelings I had right after it happened and how I still today feel like I could have done more...

He left a note that basically said that without drugs, he felt like his life didn't have a purpose. He had lost everything he had before and didn't think he could get it back.

Fast forward to a couple of years ago, had a friend call me in the middle of the night who was about a 5th of jack in and I could tell something wasn't right, but he was going on and on about how he didn't have anyone, how he had moved to Virginia to work and make money and thought that would make him happy and how unhappy he actually was.... I thought back to Mason and decided to stay on the phone with him for a couple of hours and we made plans that night for my wife and I to drive up and stay with him for the weekend. I don't know if anything would have happened that night or not, but by the sound in his voice, I couldn't take that chance.

but like @CasterTroy said, you just don't know what people deal with on a day to day basis and the mind is a very powerful and potentially dangerous place to stay in. Suicide unfortunately is on the rise with the pandemic and its really one of the saddest things to hear about.

sorry wasn't ignoring your response, busy day. I'm sorry to hear about your friend back in the day. It's def a big tragedy when this stuff happens. How I escaped was a miracle in itself. From the time I got adopted at 10 till age 16 I was bullied as the "dumb Romanian kid" lol, which wasn't necessarily false but nontheless wasn't my fault either but boy did public school and private school kids have a field day with me till 9th grade when I had enough and picked the biggest one on the first day of school and some crazy Romanian wacko side of me came out that I never knew I had and beat the crap out of that kid to the hospital bed. Then I was "cool"....then the "drugs" came with those "cool" kids and since I finally got accepted by a group, well I took it and ran with that lifestyle. I became very violent person and mean, rowdy and hell bent on taking revenge on anyone and everyone....by age 21 I had charges of 19 felonies, 14misdemeaners, 6 times in and out of jail and the final time facing 18yr prison sentence. I got saved in Jail, God gave me a second miraculous chance and my wife a year later...been married ever since and clean! (Wifey has played a big role in me being the man I am today!!!)
These are few of the reasons I've lashed out at people here before for "picking/bashing on me" lol, I don't screw around with people getting bullied cause of how it tore my life up for the worse and I had 2 best friends fall victim to this thing as well. I had a pretty f'd up childhood in romania for 10yrs so that certainly didn't help but I'm grateful now for what I have and done even though to the world it ain't much lol.

 

[marty79]

You never know what someone is suffering from. You never know the walk they have to make every single day. Sometimes it only takes a single txt or call, or visit to change the direction of a persons life. But..in the same way, you can't carry the guilt of "what if I had just...."

Personally I do my very best to be the friend I would want to have. To be the person that reaches out to folks that struggle. I do this because its the right thing to do, but also so that I can live without the guilt of wondering if I could have done more.

well spoken sir, very much agree!!