Building a house?

Blaze

Blaze

The Jeeper Reaper
Joined
Aug 9, 2005
Location
Wake Forest, NC
Probably a pipe dream, but who knows. My wife has made several comments recently about not loving our house and not being sure we'll be there forever. My in-laws asked her the other day while we were having dinner if we were going to stay in the house forever and she was like "no, I don't think so." I like the house ok, but love the shop. Well, almost love the shop, some of you know my frustrations with it, mainly the 7'11" tall ceiling.

The house has small bedrooms, small kitchen, but bigger spaces for the kids to play and all. We have over $100k in equity in the house, and paying off the house early and living free would be absolutely ideal.

The thing is, we really would want to redo the kitchen and make it bigger, which would necessitate us expanding out the back of the house where the dining room is. Then our shower in the master SUCKS (it is tiny and uncomfortable for me) so we would like to redo that. She also would love a screened porch in the back, which would be a lot of work obviously. We also would like a guest room, but that woudl be quite an ordeal. Then I would like to add on to my shop to get a taller roof, which costs money obviously.

So it all comes down to whether or not it is worth it to try and make this house have the things we like rather than have a house that has the things we want. If that makes sense.

So I start thinking. $10k for a screened porch. $40kish for a new kitchen. $10kish for a new bathroom. And that's probably WAY on the low end. Don't even want to think what it would cost to add a new bedroom. I bet we'd be seeing close to $100k in just making the house fit what we'd like. And it still wouldn't flow that well because of the layout. Then I could build a shop with a taller roof and would cost me marginally more than adding on to the shop.

We talked about it and I told her if we ever did anything, we would build a house. Put everything we want in it. Four bedrooms, screened porch, decent garage that she could actually park in (our current house garage is stupid). She agreed that would be the best idea.

Are we nuts? I know building a house is a HUGE ordeal. We would probably buy the land and try and pay it off before doing anything. That way maybe we can keep the mortgage down low and build a better house.
Eh, I don't know.

The budget minded in me says deal with it. But the guy who is frustrated when I knock all the fucking shampoo bottles off the rack turning around in the shower or tripping over the dog because the kitchen is so small, or the guy who fears that my kids will start hearing me having sex with their mom because our rooms are so close makes me think a new house would be really nice.

1st_floor_original_design.JPG

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Those are also preliminary plans for a house that we almost built a few years back. The land fell through for a few reasons and we ended up buying this house.

My wife says we bought a "nice shop with a house" rather than the other way around. :lol:
 
Went through my dad building his house. He was/is miserable over it. Always a problem and it was never exactly how he envisioned it. Didnt help that his wife is an upity bitch who was never happy and wanted to redo floor plans after the walls went up. You wont likely have that problem. Hes well over 50 and will never pay the house off. He apparently thought me or my brother would want it, but you would have to pay us to take that abomination.

That said, if youve got the means and itll make you happy, go for it! No sense in being miserable at home, especially if you can do something about it.
 
I've heard people say it was terrible. I've also had people say they loved it. When I was a kid my parents built a house. They loved it, got everything they wanted and designed the house themselves and all. They were sad when we had to move, no work up there and we headed down here to NC.
 
If you're not in the construction world somehow, and understand scheduling, price fluctuations, weather impact, utilities SNAFU's, permitting processes, etc you will have more surprises and headache than you may feel it's worth at the end of it.

If your wife can't visualize from floor plans, elevations..etc, better invest in some 3d software. If you both have similar taste it's easier, but building a house will find every little crack in your marriage. and place a crowbar in it.

Best advice I can give, is to have a budget, then double that, then add $30k for contingency. But ultimately be prepared to lose track of the actual cost in the end. For MOST people, it's not "worth it".
 
For the record, my wife has built 4 homes (with previous husband)

I have remodeled/added to 1. When we married we found a house that was 70% complete and selected finishes/tile/fixtures....etc but floor plan was set, sheetrock finished

We are in the process of building now
 
CasterTroy said:
If you're not in the construction world somehow, and understand scheduling, price fluctuations, weather impact, utilities SNAFU's, permitting processes, etc you will have more surprises and headache than you may feel it's worth at the end of it.

If your wife can't visualize from floor plans, elevations..etc, better invest in some 3d software. If you both have similar taste it's easier, but building a house will find every little crack in your marriage. and place a crowbar in it.

Best advice I can give, is to have a budget, then double that, then add $30k for contingency. But ultimately be prepared to lose track of the actual cost in the end. For MOST people, it's not "worth it".
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I work for a design build firm. Well aware of all the shit that comes with projects. :lol:

And also have 3d design software that I can draw the house up in and do walkthroughs and shit.
 
Blaze said:
I work for a design build firm. Well aware of all the shit that comes with projects. :lol:

And also have 3d design software that I can draw the house up in and do walkthroughs and shit.
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Oh hell I forgot that....:shaking: then your biggest enemy will be your wife (I mean that in a "you will discover shit you never knew about her" kinda way. The rest will be a cakewalk for you
 
CasterTroy said:
Oh hell I forgot that....:shaking: then your biggest enemy will be your wife (I mean that in a "you will discover shit you never knew about her" kinda way. The rest will be a cakewalk for you
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Yeah, that's my concern. They say the hardest thing on a marriage is building a house. :lol: My wife is about the most level headed and reasonable person I've ever met. I mean, she's put up with my shit for over 17 years now. But yeah, who knows what comes out with building a house. :lol:
 
@kaiser715
@ncsutj

Both finished up about the same time. DP has been very helpful (to me and my wife) and Casey can give you incite on his experience.
(both you AND he will enjoy his stories MUCH MORE if you share a good mason jar of shine though :cool:)
 
From a strictly financial standpoint reonavting/remodeling and especially ENLARGING a house does not make any sort of sense in the current economy.

If it was all a dollar and cents convo you'd sell now, and rent cheap for a few years wait for the next pull back and build at the bottom with cheap labor.
Sounds great on paper.
 
Ron said:
From a strictly financial standpoint reonavting/remodeling and especially ENLARGING a house does not make any sort of sense in the current economy.

If it was all a dollar and cents convo you'd sell now, and rent cheap for a few years wait for the next pull back and build at the bottom with cheap labor.
Sounds great on paper.
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In a perfect world yes, that would be the most financial sense. But not realistic for my family. :lol:

I agree with not renovating/remodeling. You also end up with a weird chopped up house layout that way too.
 
CasterTroy said:
@kaiser715
@ncsutj

Both finished up about the same time. DP has been very helpful (to me and my wife) and Casey can give you incite on his experience.
(both you AND he will enjoy his stories MUCH MORE if you share a good mason jar of shine though :cool:)
Click to expand...
Every story is better with a little shine!

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This is a battle my wife and I have a couple times a week...I never planned on our current house being our forever home, my wife really liked it when we bought it, but her primary driver was getting in something before having our first kid. I was planning on building at the time, but the cost to build was around $170 sq/ft and to buy was $130sq/ft for what we were looking at. After about 2 months into the build process, I realized I'd need to add about 50% to our budget, and I didn't really want to do that either. From there, our wants and needs have changed in the last two years for sure, much less the last 10 years...and who knows what they'll be 10 years from now. The couple things I do know, I want to be able to drive a golf ball from the center of my property, and have the golf ball still land on my property in any direction...I want a shower I can stick my arms out and spin, and not touch a wall...and I want a garage big enough to house enough vehicles for me to drive a different one every day, plus a DD for the wife. I've lived in/bought/sold/rented a couple dozen different properties in the last decade, so we're getting better and knowing what we like and want, and I think when the perfect piece of property pops up, I'll probably buy it...and see how my 'priorities' change over the next 10-15 years...then build. At 33 now, that'll put me in my mid to late-40's...so my 'forever home' will probably just be my 'until I retire home'...and then at that point in time is it even worth it. My folks on the other hand, 3-4 years ago gutted their complete first floor and remodeled their second floor...all to mimic the beach house I rented them during my wedding week (they loved the floor plan)...ended up costing them about $100k and 6 months.
 
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I would suggest not building such a big house and deffinately no upstairs, everyone that I talk to thats older and built a big house wish they had built smaller, don't use 40% of the house most of the time, don't go upstairs anymore because their knees hurt etc...

We just bought a place and when we were looking we specifically looked for single story homes, I didn't want to move furniture up to any bedrooms
 
I’ll agree with a single story home. My dads health has now went down hill and he can’t climb the steps to his bedroom, he now sleeps in my sisters room. Thankfully we are both out of the house


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drkelly said:
Don't do it. Building a house was the most miserable experience of my life.
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Building a house was the best experience of my life. :)

We have built 2....the 1st was the same year we got married. Renee moved in about 2 months prior to the wedding.

The last one was a great experience. You have to stay on top of things, and keep one step ahead of the contractor, anticipating his needs. So you aren't surprised at that 5pm Sunday phone call "hey, I forgot to ask you, what tile do you want in the master bath...tile guy starts tomorrow". We had a lot of stuff like tile, countertops, etc picked out before the roof was on. Starting out ahead really helped us out when a couple of our parents had health issues and had to downsize in the middle of all we had going on.

You also have to resist the urge to change. And keep your spouse in control. We added very little dollar-wise to the house once construction started. Biggest was doing a brick/concrete patio instead of a wood deck. About a 12k difference. It's easy to say "we're spending a few hundred K dollars, whats a few hundred more..." $500 here and $1000 there adds up fast.

Our contractor was building another house at the same time ours was going up. Maybe 3-4 weeks ahead of us in the process. They hired some fancy-pants decorator to pick colors. They'd look at flooring or tile samples and approve. Paint patches would go on the walls and they'd pick. THEN the guys wife, AFTER paint, tile, cabinets or whatever was up, would decide that she didn't like it, and have it changed. Whole house was done in a pale yellow. Whole interior was repainted 3 times. Because it "looked different" when the whole thing was painted, vs a sample patch (or whole room). Same with tile in bathrooms, cabinet faces, etc. On the day the brick was halfway up the exterior walls, she decided to add a window, and move a couple of others. If you have a wife like that, homebuilding is NOT for you.
 
Yall just go right ahead and build or buy your forever home.
We love our place and are fine here til we die.
But I hope to be in a condo near salt water before I'm 60.
I want to down size, simplify, and not have to do yardwork.
 
I'm in the final week or two of building my house. Concrete got poured on my porches and the hardwoods got stained today. We're down to a few punch list items. This is our forever home, no way I'd build another. It's been a pain picking things out. Thats the part we've hated the most. I had no idea there were 25,000 options for cabinet pulls before this process. It's been stressful but our situation is different than yours. We got pregnant, had a baby and now baby is in the hospital, all while building. Our stress level has been through the roof, not completely because of the house though obviously. Since the baby has been sick all decisions that needed to be made were either made soley by me or I said f-it and told the builder to decide. I wouldn't necessarily say pick a budget and double it, but I would add 1/3 more than what you think it will cost, especially if you don't want spec house quality. If we ever build another it will be a second home/vacation home. We have a LONG time before we could possibly be in the financial shape to swing that though :lol:
 
Sounds like most of your issues could be solved by taking baths, putting up a kennel outside and buying a roll of duct tape :D

Seriously though, I go back and forth weekly about wanting to buy property and build a house and just staying where we're at. Mostly just wants vs needs and first world problems because there is nothing wrong with the house we have now. The garage wouldn't be too small to actually work in if I didn't try to stuff a 69 c10 and 89 D350 dually in it at the same time, and the closets would be fine if my wife didnt have enough shoes and clothes for 10 women. The cheap/practical side of me says "be content with what you've got, pay off the house and be happy" and the other side says "you need a couple acres, a house with a little more space and a bigger shop".

We did just finish building a 220 sq ft addition to give us some more breathing room so maybe that will put those thoughts to rest for a while.
 
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