So I shaved the boys tonight.....

CRK

CRK

Well-Known Member
Joined
Mar 17, 2005
Location
Cary, NC
Thats right them suckers are as smooth as a babys bottom. Some may ask why? Well tomorrow I am off from work, and at around 11:00 am the good Dr. Feeljoy will make an atempt at saving me and my wife from having child # 3.

Im a little nervous about all the fuss over the paticular parts of my manhood but have been told from several men folk who are already in the know that there is nothing to worry about. I am still a little worried :eek:

One thing I did ask Dr. Feeljoy for was something to take the edge off when the local anesthetic is administered via a needle to the outer housing of the parts of me that keep hair on my face, my voice from sounding like Michael Jackson's, and a strong desire for neked' womenz'.

Upon my request the Dr. asked what I weighed, I told him 400lbs and most drugs do nothing for me!!! He said great, "about 230lbs" here go get this prescribtion filled. All I could make out of the Dr. chicken scratch hand writing was Valium..........Kool, I thought to my self. But having never taken any of this stuff I really dont know how effective it will be in my concerns for pain via a needle/scalpel/hemostats/stiches in my..................................................................................Yep you guessed it....................fawking nut sack!!!!!!


Shall be an intresting day tommorrow I tell ya!
 
I knew I shouldn't have clicked on this thread....
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Best of luck Chris, and don't worry, you'll be ok.

J
 
I think I need to go lie down.









Anyway, good luck on the nard modifications, and it ain't as bad as some people will tell ya. It'll let ya play the slots without fearing the jackpot.
 
Hey, when you're shootin' blanks you can point it at anyone you like.


The drugs will make you see purple cows in your room.

:nopics:


























Just Kidding. Hope all goes well.
 
Problem with that is you might bring something home you can't get rid of !!
 
Been through it twice....

First time: My body rejects pain meds and the in-office try failed because the muscle relaxers didn't affect me. Of course this was after he had already cut me.

Second time: Hospital, sleepy time, no problems.

But I am an unusual case, I could eat a bottle of Valium or Vicodine and never be affected. :(

Everyone says "cool", but believe me it's a curse. I have been shot up with even morphine to releave pain and it didn't help at all.

But back to the subject, I was active the next day without pain meds and playing sports within a week. It's really not as bad a most guys think. Much better on you than the alternative for your wife. And she will LOVE you for it!!!

:smokin:
 
Just don't do what my friend did.. ride his ZX-9 TO THE SURGERY.. and was forced to ride home...
 
Shouldn't this go under 'Tech" ......... :confused:

I mean when you shave a 60 or 14 bolt, it goes under tech........... :p

JB
 
Day one: Remeber getting hit by the baseball when you were the pitcher in little league? You know, when it hit you square in the privates...

Day two: Remeber how it felt the day after getting hit by the baseball, or when that fat chick in 6th grade kicked you in the nuts?

Day three: Remeber not quite making it over the rail fence?

Day four: Ever been wearing a loose swimsuit and sad down on one of the boys?

Day five: "I had surgery?"

Day six: "Hey honey, wanna practice getting pregnant?"
 
Whatever you do...DON'T go when it's cold


My appointment was in Feb. of 03 and that particular day it was an ice storm and BITTER cold...... Well of COURSE "the boys" shriveled up like scared raisins...but worse yet, the doctor had only prescribed me some MILD painkiller instead of anything that really relaxed me.....or even took ANY pain away. So here I am, being led back into the room by what HAD to be the hottest MILF I'd ever seen, freezing my ass off, short shriveled slightly to the right, when she asks me to drop trowel.




She puts THE COLDEST DAMN SOLUTION I'VE EVER FELT all around and on my sack.....if I wasn't about ready to suck my nuts back up inside me by that point...I was now :rolleyes:

Dr. "Edward scissors-hands" now arrives and tapes Jr. up so that if he scares the piss outta me I'll at least feel a warm blast on my face :p no...it was to get it out of the way "so he SAYS....ever taken medical tape off your winkie? :eek: "

He comments that I'm not really all that relaxed :rolleyes: I look down and say in my VERY best cynical voice "YA THINK"

He says he’ll have to make 2 incisions now because I’m not all “loose and free-ballin†like I was in my initial exam. Kind of like going in with a dent in a fender at dent wizard for an estimate, then coming back with 50 bullet-holes in the panel when you come for your scheduled appointment I guess

He pinches a finger-full of skin to insert the local….it wasn’t bad..but FEELING him cut me with the scalpel was a KILLER…..I came off that seat like it was wired with 480 and I just made the short with my ass.

He asked if I FELT that…AGAIN I looked down and gave him the "YA THINK" response…he said I shouldn’t have felt it.

After 2 more injections he made the cut without me feeling it….and all was fine, aside from the tugging and pulling down there (I felt my belly button rotate I think) :eek: until the stitches…he got about ¾ of the way thru and I started to feel the texture of the stitch material as it passed thru my skin.

Again I came off the seat…..He said he’s NEVER given anyone more than twice the local, and here he is giving me now, the 5th dose of local.

He said I must have had so much adrenaline pumping because of lack of relaxation (pre-medication sucked…it was a glorified freakin aspirin, not the GOOD stuff I hear other guys get beforehand) that I was basically absorbing the local and it wasn’t having an effect.

When it was done I felt like someone had clipped a 25lb weight to my sack and dropped me off a bungie platform.

The next day was rough but not as bad as the Dr.’s office. It just felt like pressure, like someone with a big boot was standing on my crotch

My whole nether-region was swollen…..looked like I’d been stung by 50 bees down there.

The following days were more of the same, with it tapering off by day 4….which was a Monday and I was at work. But I walked funny for a week


Don’t let my account scare youâ¦..Just use it as a “well it COULD be worse†scenario
:D
 
Gee, thanks Troy. At least I got 20MG of Diazepam to help ease me into it. I have never taken the stuff, I hope it works good!
 
Troy...you are right up there in the "Moorefield class" of story telling... my co-workers are all very curious as to what in the hell I can't stop laughing about!!

"And ya just can't make this stuff up!"
 
Rich said:
Troy...you are right up there in the "Moorefield class" of story telling... my co-workers are all very curious as to what in the hell I can't stop laughing about!!

"And ya just can't make this stuff up!"
Click to expand...

FREAKIN DITTO ! :lol: :lol: :lol:
Funniest thing I've read in awhile...... :)

J(still packin)B
 
HAHAHA YES! my teacher and all the students around me were like uhh what are you laughing at
NICE
Ryan
 
Thanks

I was engaged to a "writer" in college...she even got a grad schoolarship to go to the Univ of Sydney Aust. where we eventually drifted appart......years later we crossed paths and became great friends (her husband is a riding buddy of mine now)

ANYWAY...I'll shoot her emails with some of my stories every now and again, and she INSISTS on me submitting them to publishers :rolleyes: But it's nothing creative....Like Rich said...you can't make this crap up. Guess I just fall into these situations alot :D

I don't think they're all THAT...but rather just something to give my buddies a few giggles.....and if you at least laughed...then I'm happy :D

Of course, I'd LOVE to score a deal with NBC to write a show about nothing :) (Seinfeld :D)
 
WELL its a done deal! Right now its not to bad, just a dull pain like getting a good thwack on the boys. Valium was cool before i got there but wore soon. IE a buzz kill when stepping into the waitimg room. Th doc was fast too. only one small incesion and 2-3 stiches. It took less than an hour.

Troy, the spraid down the nether regions with that cold as hell stuff too. Now to get some rest.
 
Damn and to think I shave them cause it leads to fun stuff with the GF.

Get well soon CRK
 
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