Biggest douche-mobile

My son's best friend has a father building him a flat bill special.......huge lift 38-40 sumthin tires (auto no gear plans) complete with bulldozer bumper and some sort of bed lift that goes straight up (not dump).
The fellers dad is real talented at what ever he does and it will be top notch. The equation is simple....he had a big 80's show piece so his 16 year old is getting one. I personally don't get it. I guess my dad didn't hand me my toys and hobbies so I cant understand the connection.
 
Spent a few days in Tennessee last week, the douche was very strong there. Also stumbled onto the smokey mountain jeep show. If I would have taken photos of the epic levels of retardation my phone would have had a melt down. Here are the high (low) lights.

The strongest category outside of "First mod to my 4 door JK? How about 6 light bars and a 20" rock star's" was "Motherfkers that don't know how to park"
 

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Have to return 5 redbox movies and rent some more? Eff it, park in the middle of the road.
 

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There was more to this abortion than I felt like taking pictures of. A huge front piece and some more shit hanging off the back as well.
 

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Mr ghost trailer was one of the highlights. Not only was his bill at flat as he could get it he had a bed full of speakers and graced the traffic in pigeon forge with some type of dubstep.
 

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If I was gonna spend 10's of thousands of dollas on a 2wd street truck it would be low, fast and furious, not squat lifted and useless. He really should put a winch in that winch bumper so he could pull it out after he runs off the road and gets it stuck in wet grass cause he was texting his boyfriend while he was driving.
 
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josh m said:
Yea, your probably right. I have a ten month old boy, I can already see myself slapping the flat brim off his head if he tries that goofy stuff with us.
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When my kids are able to buy clothes for themselves, with money that they've earned from working... then they can buy those ridiculous duds themselves.
 
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Squeezed in here to be an asshole this morning. And yeah that Chevy was squatted
 
Joe J. said:
I think I found a douche-truck explanation video. Now for some reason I feel like I need to scratch my brain until I forget I even watched this. Sorry in advance.

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I am trying to understand how the whole "carolina squat" fad is even legal. Everyone of these douche-nozzles that drives one are 5'7" or less. How the fuck can they see out the windshield to drive?
 
superman27344 said:
I am trying to understand how the whole "carolina squat" fad is even legal. Everyone of these douche-nozzles that drives one are 5'7" or less. How the fuck can they see out the windshield to drive?
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If it makes you feel any better, *technically* you could get a fix-it ticket for it here in MD. One of the vehicle inspection requirements is for all components to be intact and "not sagging". One could make the argument that the rear must be sagging relative to the front.
I have not however ever heard of that being enforced or expect that your average LEO even knows it's a possibility.
 
RatLabGuy said:
If it makes you feel any better, *technically* you could get a fix-it ticket for it here in MD. One of the vehicle inspection requirements is for all components to be intact and "not sagging". One could make the argument that the rear must be sagging relative to the front.
I have not however ever heard of that being enforced or expect that your average LEO even knows it's a possibility.
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Technically it's illegal in nc too. There's no way you can properly aim the headlights on one of these trucks and that's part of a safety inspection, checking the headlight aim.

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Apparently a stock JKU Sahara is the official "Zombie Response Vehicle" and part of the "Zombie Outbreak Response Team"
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Joe J. said:
I think I found a douche-truck explanation video. Now for some reason I feel like I need to scratch my brain until I forget I even watched this. Sorry in advance.

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Since when does a "build" involve slapping on a bunch of bolt-on aftermarket shit, and then talking about how you need wheel spacers? Fuck, I have a credit card and a free weekend too, but let's not get carried away with ourselves. The best engineered bolt on parts are the ones that take the least skill to install.

Bonus points for spotting the Gadsden flag he takes out of the bed. My unfortunate stereotype checklist is pretty much complete.
 
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Riddle said:
Is being at Gandoff Mointain one of the levels??
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Yeah it's metaphysical, sea level, curb level, and gander mountain.
 
Loganwayne said:
View attachment 227747 think someone posted this before..... found a better pic of it on Facebook today

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I suspected it, this confirms it. There's no way that isn't a joke. That dude is making fun of the dozers. Problem is the people who don't realize you're making a joke. Jokes are a lot funnier when you don't have to explain them to everyone.
 
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